N.B Bound!

Tis the Season!

---Christmas time is here. My girlfriend is kind of getting me into the spirit, listening to Gary Hoey - highly recommended if you like Christmas music, but don't like the gayness (I mean that literally) and would prefer some awesome guitar solos, and some sweet distortion.

---I pass the eggnog aisles in Fortinos all the time, and I can hear it calling me. There are 1100 calories in the 1litre bottles.. . Delicious.

---I found out from one of Sheila's former clients that my blog is RESTRICTED at her work! No one else's is.. I feel special. Must be all the words like "poop" and "booger" I so frequently use.

---I am going back to New Brunswick in a couple of weeks and I am excited to see my family and old friends. But the thing that excites me the most is a jar of pickled whelks from my girlfriend's hometown. Whelks are gigantic snails that taste amazing. Pickle them, and you have yourself a mighty treat.

---Training is going awesome, I will have the results posted before my trip.

Life is good.

Time for a rant.

My clients are all completely destroying their goals - which makes me happy and gives me faith in humanity. Unfortunately, not much else is. I was reading a post from one of my favorite fitness contributors, he writes for a website called tmuscle.com (which is an INCREDIBLE site for anyone interested in fitness, where some of the best minds get together and talk about EVERYTHING.) and he was talking about how he went to a certain pancake franchise in the United States to indulge a little bit. The man is about 6'2, 220 pounds and about 8% body fat. So cheat meals are ok. While he was waiting for his meal, he saw a family of 5, each weighing in at about 350 pounds, wheeling another woman, who was about 400 pounds, to a nice table in the corner. As they all wheezed into their seats, the woman in the wheelchair pulls out something and puts it beside her cutlery. Her favorite pancake eating fork maybe? Nope. A needle, full of insulin, that she can jab herself with when the juicy sugary pancake goodness hits her bloodstream.

Ok, maybe it's only me. .

#1 - If you are too large to successfully walk on yor own because your tiny bones cannot handle the immense weight you are focing upon them, maybe you shouldn't be at a pancake restaurant.
#2 - If you need a needle full of insulin to counteract the sugars that you are, for some reason, jamming into your gullet, maybe you shouldn't be at a pancake restaurant.
3# - There is no #3, you shouldn't be at a pancake restaurant.

Also, while I am ranting - I hate tiny dogs. I am talking about the useless, hairless, yippy, constantly urinating and trembling everytime there is a cold breeze, kind of tiny dog. Why did we engineer these things. We all know that there is no way these things would even survive one day outside in the wild. And if carrying them under your arm makes you feel somewhat like a celebrity, maybe you should move to Hollywood, because up here in Canada, you just look silly. I was at my groomers, getting my cat groomed because she had some neck knots, and I saw 2 of these dogs. My cat could fight these dogs at the same time and win... blindfolded.

I just don't get people. They are so caught up in fashion, television, FOOD, that they don't see the big picture. Maybe it's because their gigantic sunglasses are too big. Or maybe the be-dazzling on their Ed Hardy jeans is just too damn shiny. Either way, I'll stick with my comfortable shorts, t-shirts and runners, and when the flood or the locusts come, I'll be able to sprint and find the best place to hide. And you can only come in if you get rid of the dog...

Ok, I'm done. That felt good. Everyone needs a blog.

Short post today.

Just wanted to let everyone (ok, the 3 people that read this thing) know about m new goals. My girlfriend and I have decided we are headed to the east coast for Christmas and I have a lot of family and friends there who I haven't seen for a long time. so, instead of being one of those out of shape looking guys who is constantly in a "bulking" phase as they call it just so hey can eat whatever they want, I am going to lean out. So, watch out, after 6 weeks, nobody will recognize me.

Maybe pictures to come. I don't really want to post half naked pictures of myself on my blog, but we will see. You should just be able to tell by looking at my anyway.

Also, HUUUGE congrats to a client of mine, we will call her . . Tina. . .Tina Pinterle...

3 measurements

Hips, chest and waist and a total of 6 inches lost in all!

Now, Tina has been on the scale recently at home, checking to make sure this whole "gym" thing is working, with little to no results. She had only lost 2.3 pounds in 12 weeks. Terrible Tina, terrible...

But when she tried on clothes in her closet, they fit much better than they did 12 weeks ago.

But when we took her on the body fat tester, it turns out she lost 5% of her original body fat!!

RIDICULOUS!

Good job Tina, good job.

If you have 40 minutes to spare..

I think everyone should watch these videos. I call it the "Micheal Moore effect". Because this nun (former doctor) brings to light a few different things that we should all be aware of. Take it for what you will.

Start with 1/6. .. obviously.. and it's subtitled, so sorry all of you lazy folk like me, you are going to have to read. .. unless you are Spanish, maybe I should learn Spanish so I don't have to read subtitles.. yeah.. I'm going to learn Spanish, enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=1ALISH&annotation_id=annotation_405898&feature=iv#g/c/0A9CF58121EA80DA

H1N1 and fat kids

I don't even know where to start with this. Everyone has their own opinion on this very touchy subject and I am the same way. I have read studies (I would say 'extensive' studies, but I couldn't find any) about the H1N1 vaccine and I have come to a conclusion.

My daughter will get vaccinated, and that's about it. And not against the seasonal flu, just H1N1.

I have talked to quite a few of my clients that are doctors and I have to say their feelings are mixed. I train 2 pathologists who aren't getting the shot and don't recommend it. A few of the family doctors I train believe the opposite. They are already vaccinated, and are hoping that I will get it too. But they all agree on one thing. EVERYONE is overreacting. Clinics are overcrowded and hospital waiting rooms are filled with people with mild chest congestion and a small cough who think that it's the end for them. I also don't agree with the way the government is portraying this influenza. They are scaring everyone, either into thinking that this is the next Spanish flu, or the people thinking this entire vaccine idea is a huge conspiracy theory, created by the "man" to inject humans with more "mind controlling substances" - these are usually the same people who think that the early childhood vaccines cause autism.

In my personal opinion, I think we are creating a generation of overweight, weak children, with no immune systems. Computers and video games are running our childrens lives, and we are sheltering our children from everything in the outside world. For example, I watched Pinocchio today and I can't count the number of times they talked about "killing" or the infinite number of scenes with children smoking cigars and drinking... not that these things are good, but I watched them all, and I turned out fine. Now, in children's cartoons, the bad guy's plans get foiled, and he is ready for the sequel. When I was younger I remember watching, "The Last Unicorn" and I am almost positive there is a vulture with three breats. And he DIES. . . Or she..

My point is that our playgrounds were amazing when I was younger, made of wood and 16 feet tall. There were no railings, and exercise was fun and not a chore. Ernie was telling me a few days ago that there is a computer game out for children now, that after a certain amount of play, FORCES you to go outside and preform some sort of activity, and you cannot log onto the game unless you tell the game what you did and for how long. Did the creators of this game think this was a good idea? To make children feel like they have to exersice in order to have more time on this game?

There are too many perscriptions for too many things. We are going to over medicate our children to the point where something as simple as the common cold is what is going to take them out. Their immune systems are going to just stop working for them, why bother? Everything that enters their bodies is going to be taken out by some sort of shot or nasal spray anyway.. .what's the point of having a natural defense system. Chicken noodle soup and some sleep was our choice of drug even just 20 years ago when I was young.

Generation Z, good luck to you.

Client Updates

It has been a while since I have written anything about my clients, and I figure, since my life is pretty boring, and they are completely changing their lives, it's about damn time.

To start, I have been training a 65 year old woman for about 7 weeks now, who, before starting with me, had never exercised in a gym setting before in her life. I had expected it to be hard for her at first, but she picked it right up. And she is surprisingly strong. In only 7 weeks, she has lost almost 8 pounds and 2 percent of her body fat. Her inches are dropping just as fast. People always seem to impress me. So for anyone out there who thinks it is too late, take it from me, it is NEVER too late, mind over matter. Anyone of any age or lifestyle can begin an exercise regime, no matter how "beyond help" you think you are.

I also have begun training my first blind client, which is quite the experience. Luckily, he is very co-ordinated and follows my direction perfectly. I have only trained him once so far, but I am sure he will do great. His heart is in the right place and I think his home workouts are going perfectly.

The range of clientele we have in this gym is amazing.

I am also training a young doctor who wants to put on the pounds over the winter months. He has given me some very detailed, slightly over zealous goals, and when I tell him that I am not sure if we can get to these levels in the next 8 months, he tells me that I have no choice, and there are grand repercussions for him if we don't reach them. I left it at that, and I am going to put all of my knowledge to the test and we WILL do it. I love the challenge. I can tell when I am in the back office with my client if they are serious about their training and nutrition, and let me tell you, this guy is serious.
He said by the end of our training, he is going to be trading clothes with Roger, (our gigantic trainer) and hey, there's always hope.

But all in all, I love my job, it is VERY diverse and exactly what I need, since I can pretty much get distracted by a piece of tinsel. This job keeps me on my toes and ready for anyone that walks in the door. I have noticed my nervousness going away when I have consultations and it is being replaced by excitement, as I anxiously await another client who is going to completely blow me away with his/her results.

Life is gooood.

"The Biggest Loser" OHHHHHH! He said it!

Ok. I am NOT a big fan of television. You can ask anyone, rarely do I watch anything other than basketball in the winter and some womens beach volleyball in the summer.. hehe.
But I do watch NBC's The Biggest Loser. WHAT?!?! But I'm a trainer! HOW! WHYYYY! Think of the children!!

Anyway.. I have heard waaaaayyy too many people rag on this show lately for what it portrays trainers and weight loss to be. Yes, it is incredibly dangerous to do things the way they do, and yes, Jillian yells and screams at the morbidly obese contestants. But they have doctors on site, and sorry, but some of those people NEED to be yelled at. It might not be motivating for the people watching, but these contestants are pushing themselves to the limit and the yelling has actually been proven to increase the mitochondrial release in the cells and may push their intensity farther than they could just by themselves.
I also want to address the fact that other trainers HATE this show because it shows people that they can lose weight at the rate of 24 pounds/week. Listen, if I had ANYONE come into the Studio expecting those results, I would show them the door. The fact is that EVERYONE knows that weight loss can not happen this way unless it is under the most EXTREME circumstances.
I have also read some blog entries from the contestants talking about dehydrating themselves to the point where they are peeing blood, or going on the most intense diets a few days before the big finale, just to lose the extra few pounds they need. . .now, I in NO WAY agree with this and I watch everyone else shake their fingers at the producers saying, "Look at what you are making them do?!" But honestly, look at competitive bodybuilders and the extreme lengths they go to in order to win their competitions.. And they don't get anywhere near a million dollar prize.
You can hate the show all you want, but don't deny what it has done for hundreds of thousands of people around the world. For every pound lost by American citizens, they donate a pound of food to a local charity. And they are now up to almost 3.9 million pounds lost. Now, I don't care who you are, that's damn impressive.
Now, everyone just calm down about the show, it's more relevant then "So you think you can Dance" or "Big Brother" and helps quite a few more people.

But man, the contestants really do cry waaaay too much for my liking this year.. Val, any thoughts? :)

And those are my two cents. And if I am the only one with this opinion, send me your thoughts, but not on Tuesdays between 8 and 10pm. Because I'll be watching my stories.

More milk for me, and a blog you should defintely check out.

As EVERYONE knows by now, Sheila is gone, and while this is quite a loss for the studio as we lost an exceptional trainer and a good friend, I am pretty excited that I have all the milk to myself now. No one to refill it with water, no one leaving milk IOU's around the fridge. . The future looks promising.
It has been a solid week now since she has left, and I have convinced most of her clients that have switched over to me that we do not mention her name in these walls anymore. Surprisingly, they didn't have much of a problem with it.. . Sorry Sheila.
But I wish you the best on your 5-6 month vacation, and I will try to make sure that there is a spot here for you when you get back.. seems I am the only one with this opinion though. The other guys aren't too keen on it, but I've got your back. :)

GOOD LUCK!

Now, onto actual important issues. hehe. It's nice that even though she's gone, I can still picture her reading this, squinting (more than usual) and just saying, "I hate him" over and over again.

But all of you should make your way over to a blog I have found recently. It is called "Obesity Panacea - Two researchers in pursuit of a cure for Obesity" and can be located at www.obesitypanacea.com . One of the 2 contributors is a high school friend of mine named Travis Saunders who is now a PhD student in Exercise Physiology in Ottawa, Canada. You can read his full bio on the site, there is just a little too much for me to mention here. Now this blog is FULL of very useful information and I have yet to come across a post that I didn't fully agree with. They answer all of your health related questions and are very up to date on the latest fads and marketing gimmicks that society is throwing at us. I consider their blog like an educated version of mine, as I just show you links to the most terrible inventions I have ever seen (Shake Weight, Neckline Trimmer) and shake my head, where as they actualy explain to you why these do not work, in easy to understand scientific terms.
Their "Top 10" blog posts is one of the best reads I have had in a while and I wish more health professionals put as time time and effort into their craft as these two have.

Take a look and see for yourself. I also recommend signing up to get updates by email as everything they post is worth reading.

And Sheila, if you have read this far and still don't have the urge to send me anthrax, I want you to know that your cat never fought back, not once. ;)

My personal "Train the Trainer."

So, now that that is out of my system .. and I am going to try not to rant about it, I will let all of you try to figure out why it is terrible all by yourselves. (If you don't know what I am talking about, check my last blog post)

But on to my personal challenge. I have been seeing clients reach their goals and completely change their lives for the better in the last year that I have been with the Studio. It absolutely blows my mind what these people have done with their bodies and their metabolisms. So, now, I think it is my turn. I am going to pick up my training volume and intensity DRAMATICALLY in the next 6 months and really put my knowledge to good use. Ok, I know what you are asking yourselves, "But Bryan, why are you telling us? We really don't care that much..." I understand this, but you have to understand that this now holds me accountable for what happens to my body in the next 6 months. I am going to transform myself completely. And as much as I don't want to, I am going to post my starting numbers up here for everyone to see. I am going to periodically update here on my blog and at the end, I will have some before and after pictures.

So, here's to 6 months, let's see what happens until May 1st, 2010.

Starting weight - 172
Starting Body fat percentage - 13.2 - Hey, it's been a lazy summer.
Startng 1RM Squat - 220
Starting 1RM Deadlift - 265
Starting 1RM Bench Press - 205
Starting 1RM Bent over Row - 170
Starting # of consecutive Pull ups - 6 (my worst category by far)
Starting 1RM Military Press - 120

Tme to get down to business.

...

I .. . . am.. . .. so.. .. mad. .. . right. .. . now.. ..


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSpUaTPKkCk&feature=player_embedded

Locke St Festival

What an amazing Saturday. I worked all morning and was thinking that being at the festival until 8pm would be exhausting, but the energy there was contagious. There were so many vendors and different musical acts, it was incredible. I had never been to the festival before, but I am definitely going next year. And the best part was that we were set up right outside of Westown and next to the jazz tent! So many people came over to try our "60 second rope challenge" and I was surprised at what they could do. It's harder than most people think it is!

We even had to close down early because we just had nothing left to hand out. There seemed to be some genuine interest in the company and I am really excited to see the outcome. And for all of you first time readers, just coming to the site to check it out, what are you waiting for! Come on down to the studio, and meet with one of us, you wont regret it.

ENDAST tonight.

For those of you who don't know... I like metal. Not all the time, but every once in a while I need my metal fix. So, as it turns out, tonight is that night. I know a few guys in a band based out of Montreal who call themselves Endast. Now, this isn't metal for the faint of heart, it's loud, sweaty, and last time I was at one of their shows, I got knocked out in the mosh pit.. . good times.

Check them out on Myspace if you like good, heavy metal.

http://www.myspace.com/endast

It s at the casbah tonight if anyone is interested, though I am fairly certain nobody reads my blog AT ALL, let alone on a Friday evening, looking for plans.

On a more "vomity" note, I found out the hard way that my daughter gets motion sickness very easily. I bought a strap that you hook onto the back of your car that is supposed to get rid of motion sickness, but judging by the projectile vomit produced on the highway this morning and the fact that my car now smells like a dirty hospital, I'd say they might want to do some more research.

It's going to be rough for a little while, but if anyone knows of anything to help prevent it, that would be a big help. I put some motion sickness magic potion I bought at the drug store in her bottle every morning, but it just doens't seem to do the trick. I've tried trying to play with her to help her not think about it, but looking in the back seat and making faces while going 100+km/hr, is generally frowned upon by the other motorists.

I'm also eating milk chocolate covered blueberries right now... As Sheila put it, I'm "in my element."

Delicious element.

Endast - Sweeeet.

The Weather!

I know.. Incredibly exciting blog title. But that's what I want to talk about. The Weather.

It has been a terrible 2 summers that I have spent here so far, having to lock myself indoors for about a week and a half altogether. Some of the days here got up to 47 degrees.. I remember. I was peeking out of my blinds with the lights off and 2 air conditioners blaring. Anyone who knows me knows I sweat like a fat kid.. no wait, more like 2 fat kids naked, taped together.

But this summer has been amazing, granted there were days I went outside and immediately felt sick because of the heat, but not HALF as many as last year. . Everyone I talk to is complaining about the summer, but, I would like to thank the province of Ontario for giving me this summer.

And I want to finish off by saying that the snowball was an AMAZING throw, it hit her right in the hand that had the coffee in it... I told her to look at something that didn't exist and then tossed with all of my might.



It reminded me of that scene from my favorite movie "The Terminator" where Arnold is looking for Sarah Connor in "Tek Noir"... and when he finally sees her, the IMMEDIATE GLARE he gives her.. That's kind of what Sheila did to me after I hit her coffee... I was legitimately scared.

ROBOTS!

Yeah yeah, I know, Sheila is the one who loves robots..

But I was sent an article earlier this week that made me REALLY question this whole "robot building" nonsense. Take a look and tell me what you think.. Creepy..

http://www.geekologie.com/2009/08/wonderful_news_robots_learn_ho.php

Have you ever seen IRobot? Will Smith was onto something.


In any case, I'm keeping my eye on my blender at work.. . I think I caught it looking at me funny.

I hope to get "Man Tracked"

I know, it sounds perverted, but it's actually a reality show in which contestants are essentially "hunted" by a man on a horse. It's a 2 day journey through un-familiar terrain, with only a compass and a map to assist you and your companion.

Sounds amazing right? Wait, it gets better. . There is no prize for winning, (winning means getting to the finish line 32 kilometers away before being caught.) only the satisfaction of knowing that you can outrun a man on a horse..

So, I am filling out a "prey application form" right now and so is Sheila. Hey, it's a long shot, but I think we have a chance of getting chosen. The application form is about 7 pages long with very odd questions like, "What magazines/newspapers do you read?" and, "Are you being considered for any other reality show?". .

Come on, who cares? I just want to be in my natural habitat for 2 days, possibly wearing war paint, running my ass off and hiding in bushes.

Nice.

Robot Knees

So, I'm thinking maybe I should cut of my legs just above the knee in some sort of freak chainsaw "accident", then I can have a fundraiser to get some nice new robot legs, ones that don't give out, and just need a good oiling. Even body weight squats now are getting pretty difficult.

I got my ultrasound done on Monday, so I'm hoping to get the results back relatively soon, as one of my clients got me a referral to a very good orthopod that I can't see until I get my results. I don't know how much he can do, I've already tried all of the muscle imbalance and mobility stuff that I know, sooooooo, it's all up in the air right now.

I hope I don't need surgery. . . but I would rather have surgery than arthritis.

I'm getting the damn chainsaw. Or, I'll just get Sheila to do it, she wouldn't think twice.

Ditto.

Short post..

Back flips are amazing. I would have rocked them out no problem, but Sheila's damn neck kept getting in the way. And she kept feeling up my chest while spotting. I know! Weird..

Sheila was getting it pretty good, but her INSANE AMOUNT OF SWEAT kept getting in the way of Roger and I doing a good job spotting.. . man, she sweats more than Roger and I combined.

Roger rocked it second time through. . After I realized saying, "Uh Oh" midway through the jump was probably not the best idea.

Just like Sheila, my job is awesome.. . you don't think so? Why don't you go outside on your lunch break and try some back flips with your co-workers. No? And the best part is, nobody looked at us like we were idiots.. they know the truth.

A step in the right direction

Awesome.

This post will be short, but I will say that Hamilton is getting the picture.

I was reading thespec.com today and saw an amazing idea. It's an outdoor park that has resistance machines. Leg press, eliptical, rowing machine and a couple of others. And people of all ages can use it because it is based off of your own body weight.

It is vandal proof, completely weatherproof, and it's a lot of cool colors!

Good job Hamilton. It's a step away from being the most overweight city in Canada. :)

http://www.thespec.com/go/healthfitness/article/592965

Bulletproof vest + ACF trainers = Internal bleeding.

So recently, we had one of our clients bring in a bulletproof vest. And I don't mean a flimsy, kevlar covered vest that policeman wear now.. I mean a 25 pound, kick ass, porcelain composite, covered with kevlar kind of vest that can stop missle attacks.
So, if anyone is going to volunteer to put this bad boy on and see who can hurt him.. . of course it was going to be me. Some people think I am weird.. Ok, everyone thinks I am weird, but who else can say they get paid to get beat up while wearing a bulletproof vest? So it started with a lat pulldown bar, just a nice tap.. . then a little harder.. but we quickly realized that that made a lot of noise, so we upgraded to kicks.
Sheila was first. I figured, being a black belt and harboring some pretty intense anger from me making some "not so professional" comments for the last 9 months, that she was going to destroy me. She ran from the other side of the studio and kicked me very hard. I could see the gleam in her eye when she was running towards me.. . pure glee. But it didn't hurt at all... and she kicked me hard. This vest is awesome. Unfortunately for my insides, Roger was there too. I saw him standing on the other side of the room, in the shadows, rubbing his hands together, with a little smile on his face. Now, as much faith as I had in said vest, Roger is about 6"4, probably 6"5, and around 260 pounds. But, why not. So he started out with a nice front kick, not too shabby. But still no pain. So he decided to make a run from the other side of the studio as well.



Can you think of the most afraid you have ever been in your entire life? Picture an ex CFL player of 10 years, half smile, half grimace, running at you full tilt, and you knowing that his size 15's are going to connect with your chest in a matter of seconds. I wont lie, it was intense. Then came the boot. It knocked me back a good 6 feet, but didn't even take my breath away. Awesome.

So, since then, I have had the vest on a few more times, used it for some focus pad sessions, and have probably taken more kicks to the chest then should be allowed, but hey, I bet it's only a coincidence that I coughed up some blood yesterday. And that I can't take deep breaths.. . Uh oh.

I'm kidding, it was awesome.

Have I mentioned my job is awesome?

Am I too OLD?

So, I've been thinking that I want to learn how to do some sort of front/back/side flipping before I pass away, so I've been looking into BG's in Burlington to see what they have to offer. Fortunately for me, they have such a program. The small town I came from had one sort of "gymnastics" gym, but it was about 20km outside of the city, and as an 8 year old, that seemed like a far trek after school, but it was always something I knew I would do when I got older. But then I got a bit older. And I started playing more sports, dating and overall being a young guy who thought that guys doing back hand springs was kind of "fancy." Now that I am even older, and would like to say "more mature", I would love to be able to knock out a backflip at a party, or if need be, running away from the CIA, or whoever was chasing me. My training as of late has been focusing on becoming ridiculously strong, but I think I am going to throw in some exercises that make people go, ". . . cooooool.. "
So, keep reading, and hopefully in a few months, I'll be doing some new exercises that I can be excited about.
On another note, I went to boot camp again, but this time it was "Bring a Friend Day" for the campers. So a few women brought their husbands, even a few brought their children. My faith in mankind has been raised as of this morning, because I saw people that barely had their eyes open running relay races at 5:40 am... neat. Not that they weren't mumbling their share of pretty hateful words, mostly towards their spouses for making them get up that early, but it was all in all pretty fun.

And at the end they all got an apple. You can't start off your day any better.

Stag and Doe

So tonight is going to be a good night. I am a groomsman in my good friends wedding in a few months, and tonight is his Stag and Doe. I am going to be passing out jello shooters and harping on about supportive nutrition all night. ACF has been nice enough to donate a consultation with me, along with a few other items, to be given as one of the prizes tonight. There are going to be around 250 people there, so i's going to be good to get our name out... Even if all of the people there are going to be half in the bag.
My training is going a lot better now, I am a lot more focused and am also trying a new program. I have a few clients that I am VERY excited about as well. Wait, who am I kidding, I am excited about all of my clients.
Have any of you ever had a job where you can honestly say there is no aspect of said job that you hate? Honestly... the only part of my job that I don't like is changing the garbage at the end of the night.. and that takes about 40 seconds.. It's kind of weird. I know, I know, you are jealous.

Robot Monkeys... ppffffft.

Now one of my clients just made me google "Squirrel Launcher". .. now THAT is a video.

Montreal!

So I was in Montreal this past weekend for a wedding and I forgot how nice that city is. I went with a couple of friends and we decided to take the train. It only takes 5 hours on a train... that is awesome. What's not so awesome is that you don't get to pick who sits around you. One guy loved Bon Jovi. I mean he LOVED him. He had his ipod turned up so loud that I could make out every word. But the worst part was that he decided that maybe Jon needed a backup singer, so he piped in.. Wow. I would have to compare that sound to someone who has been trapped under building rubble for at least 13 hours, has his legs crushed and is loudly whimpering for help.. . while being lit on fire.
Other than that, the trip was awesome, I can't say I ate very supportively, but it was a vacation and how can you turn down bacon wrapped shrimp kabobs.. seriously. I saw some really good friends that I hadn't seen in a while, and made quite a few new ones. (I also passed out a few business cards. .who knows?)

But now I am back on track, fully recovered and ready to get some clients their BEACH BODIES! I wish someone would help me find mine, I think I lost it..

P.S - My daughter is walking now, and constantly screeching as lous as she can, for absolutely no reason. Being a dad is fun, I wish I could be in my daughter's head, just for a minute, so I could know why she decides that screaming at a box of wipes is the right thing to do.

New workouts are fun.

It is going to take me a long time to write this blog entry.. mostly because I have to correct almost every word, due to my hands shaking. That's when I know it's been a good workout, my hands are shaky and my legs don't walk in the direction I want them to.

Contrasts. Try them. www.t-muscle.com has an amazing article on what they are and how to destroy your body doing them. It's basically based on the idea that your muscles can be confused. Same idea as if you were to pick up a glass of water that you though was full, but had no water in it. Your mind would tell your muscles to exert more force to pick up the glass, so it would come up fast.

So start with a heavy exercise with a weight you can do roughly 6 times, followed by the same exercise, but unloaded and explosive. This is how my sets with Jeff went. (Ernie's brother-in-law that I work out with at the studio. . he is the one that makes sure I do these workouts and not go half-assed.)

Squats - Heavy 3 sets - 6 reps
After your first set is over, jump to
Explosive jump squats 3 sets - 15 reps

Deadlifts - Heavy 3 sets - 6 reps
Kettlebell Swings 3 sets - 15 reps

Bench Press - Heavy 3 sets - 6 reps
Explosive push ups 3 sets - 15 reps

Bent over row - Heavy 3 sets - 6 reps
Explosive pull ups 3 sets - 15 reps

By then, it's time for some good old fashioned hand tremors.

I love my job.

5 am ain't so bad

So I did bootcamp twice this week. I'm not bragging, is was incredibly tough. Congratulations to all of these women. All full of smiles (well, most of them) and some of them even laughing this early.
Wednesday was awesome. I arrived to find Ernie standing in the middle of the parking lot with a sheet of paper and a finger on his chin. These ladies didn't know what they were in for. The entire pier had just become an obstacle course.
From 5:45 until 6:35 they had to do 6 different sections of this obstacle course, with each of them either a strength or cardio station. I am still amazed at what they did. I can't get over it honestly. The ladies show up, no make up on, sweatpants and a t-shirt, ready for a workout.
If anyone is reading this that isn't in the bootcamp yet (I actually don't know if anyone reads this at all) get your butt out there. The first day is the hardest, but I found myself getting kind of excited as I ate my oatmeal at 4:45am on Wednesday morning.

Youe energy is contagious ladies! Keep it up!

Big Shiny Tunes 4

Ok, so this has nothing to do with that cd, but I am listening to it now and it is bringing me back. .Oh Serial Joe, where has the time gone..

It's Saturday morning and that means I am at the gym. I know Sheila and Ernie have already talked about it in their blogs, but man, that ti-cat training camp was fun. And the one thing Sheila forgot to mention is that when she wanted a break from all of the testosterone filled, 6'3, 230 pound men, she came over to stand by me... damn it. Do I not emit testosterone?
Bah. These guys were tough. And they were also surprisingly down to earth. Nice fellows, joking around, introducing themselves. . I liked it. It started out being pretty intimidating though, showing them how to exercise. You would assume these giant men would know exactly what they were doing in the gym, but at every station they were asking for advice, making sure form was right.. I guess it isn't really their job to know how to do these lifts, that's why we are there.

My knees are beginning to get a bit better, more tests at the end of July. I'm crossing my fingers at tendonitis. Oh, to be young and in shape again with soft, supple joints .. what I wouldn't give.

Wait, I'm only 24... damn it.

I just don't get it.

I will admit, I am quite a happy fellow. But there are things out there that frustrate me and make me shake my head in disgust.

It started this morning at 6:15 when I woke up with my daughter. I turned on the television while we ate some breakfast, and of course, the early morning infomercials are running. I catch the middle of an episode (I wont tell you what the name of the product was) that had to do with "Electronic Muscle Stimulation" for your abdominals. For anyone who hasn't seen these machines before, it is a belt. .. FILLED with electricity.. that people CHOOSE to wear around their waists. Now, I have worn one of these belts before, my friend's dad had owned one, and in my early high school years decided to put it on and turn it up to the highest setting. I felt like a giant man had grabbed my core and squeezed it as hard as he could for three seconds. I couldn't breathe or even scream. It was truly uncomfortable.
People are BUYING these things to wear all day to, "stimulate abdominal contractions" and "get the belly they have always wanted!" And my favorite line, that I couldn't get out of my head all day was, "and you don't have to do ANYTHING AT ALL!"


Is this what we have come to? A culture of lazy, lazy human beings who would rather wear a belt that zaps their insides, then come to the gym and lose some weight? I've got news for you people out there.. These will not help you lose weight.. Sure, they will contract your abdominals, but seriously, it saddens to to think that someone out there could be so misinformed to believe that this power belt is the answer to their flabby prayers..

Even while I write this post, I shake my head. If you show me one person who has gotten the "6 pack of their dreams!" from this machine, I will purchase one and wear it on my face for an entire day. Hopefully it will get rid of my chubby cheeks.....

We are just like you..

As of late, I have been feeling. . I wouldn't call it un-motivated, but just not quite into my workouts as much. I get this way once a year or so, I'll ome to the gym, ready to go, then halfway through my workout, I will just stop. And this has nothing to do with lack of energy, I just stop.
Sometimes I feel like I need a trainer. I see my clients reaching all of their goals (which is awesome) and I wonder if I just need someone screaming at me and making sure I do all of sets..
I am going to start coming to the gym with someone else I think. I've had workout partners in the past, but they just haven't had the same goals, or motivation that I have had.
Hmmm. ..

Sort of on the same note, we have started the ACF annual "Train a Trainer" charity auction, and the bids are already coming in. No big surprise, but Sheila has the highest so far at $150. hehe.
Unfortunatley, I wasn't here to take part last year, but I did see a few of the videos.. wow. You clients can be a little bit cruel.
So once the bidding is over, I guess I will find out if it's just a kick in the butt I need to go on with my own training. . . I am kind of excited.. Is that weird? I guess weird is sort of a pre-requisite to working here...

Frustrated...

Ok, so today is venting time. My vent today is about "personal trainers.." I wont mention any gym names, but I think you guys know which ones.
The story starts with my mother, who is a very sedentary woman, who needs a lot of mobility work, and a lot of stretching. Typical office worker, tight anterior, weak posterior. So she decides to get a gym membership. .. wicked, that's a good start. Then she decides she needs a personal trainer. NICE! Now she wont be one of the many that is overwhelmed by the whole "gym" scene.
WRONG. Terrible idea. The first workout consists of a "circuit" .. so 8 machines, mostly isolation machines, and a LOT of pain for my mother who has, at most, opened a car door for exercise in the last few years. She couldn't move for about a week, then the pain slowly subsided.
Needless to say, being in the profession I was in.. I was angry. Very angry. So I called another gym, talked to the HEAD TRAINER to which I explained my mothers predicament. He was happy to brag up his assistant trainer (who I think is awesome so far) and told me to send my mom in.
SO, in she went. Tonight was the first time I talked to her since her initial consultation in which the assistant trainer said all of the right things in my opinion. Knew where she needed help, and knew what not to do. But, unfortunately my mother prefers, like most women, to be trained by another woman. So this assistant trainer even said about his OWN gym, that there weren't many trainers he would refer her to, but he knew of one that would be good. Now. .. my mother is doing the SAME circuit that she did at the last gym.. . but now they are adding in some isolation oblique exercises.. I am fuming.
My mom tried to calm me down, but this "trainer" is just reinforcing strength in her bad postural position. And to make things, worse, she is the most sore in her chest. .. one of the areas she should be STRETCHING, not strengthening.. Needless to say, she thinks I am overreacting because in another 6 weeks, she is done with the training, and they let her free in the gym to do what she wants. So really, all she paid a LOT of money for, was for some IDIOT to ask her about her day and direct her to each circuit machine.

So I told her to pretend that she referred me to a doctor. And that doctor decided to stab me very hard in the chest every time I came in. My mom would be angry right? If I called her, and was like, "Mom, my chest kind if hurts, I'm going to see this doctor, and he stabs me everytime I come in." She would get very angry. But wait, what if I told her that in only 6 weeks, he was going to just give me a knife and let me loose on my own to stab myself in the chest. Any better? What if I paid him an absurd amount of money to do it? No? Hmmm...

This is my job. I see "trainers" like this all the time. I am going to call Chris, who seems very smart, he wants to leave the whole big gym scene in a few months and start his own private thing, kind of like ACF. But I told my mom she has to get rid of this trained monkey and actually get a trainer who doesn't just see her as a number on a sheet.

Gyms like this make me SOOO happy to be working at a place like All Canadian Fitness with Ernie and our other trainers.



. ... I feel a little better now.. . .

Healthy chocolate, Underwear workouts and HUGE strength gains!

Ok, let me get started by saying this is probably going to be a long post.. I first have some venting to do. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS HEALTHY CHOCOLATE. I don't care what you hear, I don't care what you read. If you think chocolate can be healthy, you can't be helped. Sure it has anti-oxidants, sure it has some essential fatty acids... it also has an insane amount of sugar and fat per BITE. .
So please, if you see people selling healthy chocolates, for the love of god.. just come to the gym.

SECOND! I love my gym, do you know why? What would you do if you forgot your shorts at home.. you would probably turn around and leave right? Nope, just have a good old boxer workout. I was hesitant at first, but after the statment, "What? They look like biking shorts.." How can I argue that.

FINALLY! This is nuts. Michael Stevenson. I just started training him 16 days ago. He was on a very intense 14 day strength and growth program. I wouldn't recommend this program for everyone .. I haven't even tackled it yet. But after these results, I will be soon. I'm just going to post them.

Feb. 26/09 - Mar. 8/09

-Starting Bench Press - 4 reps - 145 lbs.
Final Bench - 3 reps - 175 lbs.
-Starting Squat - 4 reps - 175 lbs.
Final Squat - 6 reps - 225 lbs.
-Starting Deadlifts - 4 reps - 155 lbs.
Final Deadlifts - 3 reps - 185 lbs.
-Starting Lat Pulldown - 4 reps - 135 lbs.
Final Lat Pulldown - 6 reps - 170 lbs.
-Starting Bent Over Row - 4 reps - 130 lbs.
FinalBent Over Row - 1 rep - 155 lbs.
-Starting Military Press - 4 reps - 85 lbs.
Final Military Press - 5 reps - 110 lbs.

NOW! Even with minor grip problems, the bent over rows went up that much.. and he didn't even deadlift the last week due to a bit of low back pain.. LOOK at these numbers!

Fine, I'll do the addition.

Bench is up 30 lbs.
Squat is up 50 lbs.
Deadlift is up 30 lbs. - with no deadlifting the last week!
Lat Pulldown is up 35 lbs.
Bent Over Row is up 25 lbs. - with grip issues!
Military Press is up 25 lbs.

That's a total of 195 lbs in 2 weeks.. Think about that. And it's not like he was unconditioned before we started this, he still went to the gym 3 times a week on his own. This is where dedication can get you people, CHOCOLATE IS NOT THE ANSWER!

Michael 2 weeks ago ------------------------------------ Michael now

Stupid flesh joints..

So, the gym was awesome. There were quite a few guys out there who knew some things about stuff, and taught me to do some things that I never knew that I loved. Like front flips. Not that I am a front flip expert, but give me a mat, and I can pull a few out. But the negative is that I pulled something, or sprained something in my wrist. It makes work a bit harder, since I have little to no mobility at the moment, but hopefully it will be better in a few days.
Other than this, my body fat percentage is down to 9.8 and my mile is stuck at 6:04... Soon..

I have more than a few clients I am excited about at the moment and can hopefully get some updates up here soon about them...

KETTLEBELLS

Ok, so I could just set up a bed in the back room at the gym and live there now. We have kettlebells! I am very excited about our new equipment and am going to be implementing them shortly into many of my workouts, and some of my clients as well. I am a big advocate of kettlebell training, not solely kettlebells, but they definitely have their place in my heart. Now all we need is a sled and some astroturf outside and this will be my heaven... Am I weird?

Mile time - 6:07 . .. want to break 6 minutes.. But oh so vomity after sprinting 10mph for 6 minutes.

Also, I am heading to a gym in Burlington on Sunday to probably hurt myself doing some things I probably shouldn't be doing on trampolines and in foam pits. Must get back into Parkour, I've got the bug. Backflip by the end of the summer? Palm Spin? Time will tell..

Can you live in a toybox?

So, it's Monday - Family day! As I sit here and think about work, clients, and accomplishments, I think about what an awesome job I have. It's only been three months, but the difference I see in client attitudes, body composition and overall goals is amazing. It's incredible to see what people can do. I'm not taking any of the credit either.
I consider my job like a section specialist at Home Depot. . or somewhere like that. Say I worked in the lumber section and a man comes to me and says, "My wife has been on me to build my family an amazing house, I have no idea where to start, or what to buy, and I really need your help." Well, I could give him all the wood he would need and explain to him perfectly how to build that house. I could even draw out some plans based on how his wife (because we know she is in charge) wants the house to look. But if he took all of that wood home, threw my plans away and built a toybox, I think he would be a single guy, living in a toybox.. My point is that I can preach and preach about good nutrition, homework and resistance training, but if they don't execute it, it's not going to work. I can take credit for knowing ways to fix their problems, but ultimately it is in the hands of the client to push themselves to achieve their goals.
I only see them for 2, maybe 3 hours a week, and as much as I would like to follow them around and slap them every time they pick up a chocolate bar, or yell at them when they don't want to finish that last set at home, I just can't be in that many places at once. .. yet. .. (Hopefully, Bryan cloning will be available to the general public soon.)

Anyway, good job to my exceptional clients. . you know who you are. . and KEEP IT UP!

I Smell Spring..

Delicious!

The shorts are about to come back out of retirement, no more jackets to work, only sweaters. Spring is here! Ok, it's a New Brunswick spring, but still, -5 is good enough for me. Everything is beginning to thaw and trees are losing their "grey" look.
And everyone knows what that means.. It's time to start jumping over things again. Parkour is officially on the go March 1st. I'm calling it right now. I'm pretty pumped. I've noticed a strength increase over last year, and my endurance is better as well, so I'm excited to go out with a few people from last year and see how things look.

Have you ever listened to a song and thought, "This song makes me want to run as fast as humanly possible, and jump over everything that gets in my way. ." ? No? Just me?

Well, here are a few of my favorite Parkour songs, they aren't necessarily the fastest songs, or the most English, but I like them anyway.

- Asian Dub Foundation - Flyover.
- Massive Attack - Teardrop
- Soil - Halo
- Disturbed - Indestructible (Fitting eh?)
- Bush - Machine Head
- Five Finger Death Punch - Ashes

I'm getting antsy, I want to go jump over things right now.. Maybe i can set something up in the gym..

I see the summer of '09 being a summer where I conquer a lot of obstacles.. break a few personal records.. and possibly some bones. We will see..

Carrying the Torch

I have come to the conclusion that I want to carry the torch for the 2010 Winter Olympics. I saw an ad today on t.v that said for an average joe like me, that dream might not be that far away. Hmmm..

Anyway.. Everything else is good, training is going well, I'm getting back into things slowly, I've been a very busy guy for the last few weeks, so training has been twice a week at best. I decided last week that I should try to run a mile, and see what my time was. I was guessing about 7 minutes, but after a good warm up I hit 6:35. I think I will try again next week now that I know my limits.

My cat and I are doing a lot of bonding. She sleeps on me every night, even when I turn on my side, she will find a way to snuggle in there. Cats are relaxing...

Well, I should do something productive now. 3 random thoughts are good enough at the moment.

Holiday Indulgence

So, Christmas is over.. It is January and you know what that means. The countdown begins until I can undo the belt again and go wild for 2 weeks like this holiday season. I am not going to lie to you and say I had Christmas salads and water shooters over the holidays.
We trainers are only human, just like you. To be honest, I gained 7 pounds in those two weeks. But I know my metabolism, and if just sneeze 6 times, that will be gone.
I have given most of my clients a bit of leeway, there are boundaries that should not be crossed, like the "excessive gravy" boundary, and the "3rd glass of eggnog" boundary, but for the most part I don't want people moping around during Christmas being angry that they can't enjoy turkey.

Now, I'm not saying they didn't pay for their un-fitness sins the first day they got back to the gym, I had many clients raise their eyebrows at me while saying, "I don't think so." But threaten them with a scale, and they are more than ready to go.

I am back on track now, and much like everyone else, have a few body composition related resolutions that I plan to achieve before next year rolls around. I can only hope some of you come to me with new goals you would like to achieve, because I would be more than happy to be the one person that made a resolution stick.